She never saw it coming
by dreamweaver26
Summary: She was his drug...his ultimate addiction...how bad could it get? My first try on TRORY fiction... PLZ read
1. Chapter 1

She gracefully turned the pages of her book as a soft stream of music enveloped her, an ear bud occasionally found it way out of her

ear. He could tell she was in a distinct place, somewhere else where time didn't matter. His fingers ached to touch her skin, the

warmness caused by the sight of her intensified each day. It was too much to hold in and pretend it was nothing. His father always told

him, _men never show their emotions they are put on this land to carry on the family_. Like his father ever knew what family was,

too bad he mostly never home to be it. She had an effect on him, like a trigger inside his senses, he could never tell. Each day he with

held his words and spewed only insanities that should have never left his mouth. She fought back each time, and he couldn't get enough

of it. He walked away from his hiding place and replaced his demeanor.

_Give me chance, I'm new to the fan fic world, but I have read a lot of fan fic's and TRORY's always are my favorties, so i'm trying one out. Thanks for reading._


	2. Chapter 2

**For this chapter I am trying to build Tristan's character, he might seem a lil out of character or a lot at times. Hehe, I don't own anything except the other unknown characters that pop up. Thanks for reading.**

"Looks like the King finally decided to grace us with his presence," It was Tyler who spoke. Tristan and Tyler have known each other since they where practically in their mothers' wombs.

"You know, if you weren't like my brother I would've just drop kicked your ass back to the Hamptons," Tristan sat across from him.

"Really Tristan, since when do we use the word, pardon me words, _drop kick," _he cocked and eyebrow and did some air quotes.

"Who's planning on killing who now?" a new face sat next to Tyler. Tyler unconsciously ran a hand through his dark blond locks.

"Eh nothing is going on Lasaro," Tyler motioned towards Tristan now. "This guy seems to think--" Before he could finish Lasaro cut him off.

"Right, back to reality, party on Smith St, who's going?"

"Can-" Tyler began once again only to be cut off by Tristan.

"Yeah, I got you covered!" Tristan then took Lasaro's lunch tray.

"Will you guys stop cutting me off when I'm trying to talk?" Tristan and Lasaro stopped their small fight over the lunch tray. His light brown eyes blazed with playfulness as he looked at his angered friend. His hair fell into his eyes he quickly pushed back is dark brown hair. Tristan rubbed his eyes, it was suddenly apparent the lack of sleep he had gotten. His golden locks that looked naturally tousled were lifeless almost dirty looking. Lasaro lunged at Tyler, sending them crashing to the floor. Tristan sighed and quickly separated the two. Before any of them could speak the bell rang signaling the end of lunch.

"Saved by the bell," Tyler muttered as he dusted himself. Lasaro just laughed.

"Right… new flavor waiting by the door, don't wait up," Tristan took off towards the slim, bleach blonde who was twirling her hair with every chew of her gum. She pulled her already short skirt a little higher as he came closer.

"Our friend the man whore," Lasaro swung his arm around Tyler's neck.

"Yup, but they do get hotter and hotter each time," Tyler shrugged out of Lasaro's grip and grabbed his book bag. Lasaro followed him out of the cafeteria.

"Alright students, as the clock ticks off, I want to remind you before you leave to pick up your group assignments along with the project details," the teacher turned to the chalkboard when she heard the door open. "Mr. Dugrey, nice of you to join us," she set her chalk down and wiped her hands. "Tell me Dugrey, why are you thirty minutes late to my class?" she crossed her arms as her class began to whisper.

Tristan sighed tiredly but before he could open his mouth to his new excuse the teacher cut in.

"See me after class," she glared at him lightly. That was when he noticed her sad expression. What he didn't know that she was hurt, he hurt her everyday. She fought the feelings he gave her everyday. She fought them hard because it was hard to pretend that the electricity running through her body was just because she was cold. But what would it matter, Tristan didn't know the meaning of what she was feeling, he was all about the good time and that's it. She suddenly realized that they were both staring at each other. She turned away quickly and pretended to look through her notebook. Tristan took his seat, his insides were burning and his head was spinning fast. Someone tapped his shoulder, he turned back slowly.

"That must have been some kind of make out, you seem to be lost," Tyler chuckled. Tristan didn't register what he said; his mind was still spinning with her eyes. Tyler lightly punched him.

"Are you listening to me?"

Tristan blinked finally, "Nope."

"Alright students, I figured I should pass out your assignment now," the teacher had just turned away from the chalkboard. She picked up a pile of folders from behind her desk and walked to the front of her desk. "When I call your names please step forward and pick your folder up," she put the pile in the empty desk in front of her and held up two.

"Tyler Bennington and Lasaro Locke" Lasaro pumped his in the air, Tyler groaned. This pairing was seen before. It usually ended up with Lasaro just doing the typing. When Tyler sat back down, Tristan turned to him and patted his shoulder.

"Good luck with that," Tyler glared at him.

"Oh yeah, well lets see who you get paired with," Tyler said knowingly. The teacher kept reading off the names as the two fought.

"Five bucks is Jocelyn Barker," Tristan stuck his hand out. "She swoons as the sound of my name; she'll finish it on her own."

"Ten that its not, and forty says you'll enjoying your partner," Tyler smirked. He unlike Tristan was half listening to him and the teacher. He noticed it was slimming down to Lorelai Leigh Gilmore and his buddy Tristan Dugrey. Tristan turned around and waited for his name to be called.

"Tristan Dugrey and um…… Lorelai Gilmore," she held up the last two folders. Tristan's stomach took a nose dive; Rory's legs seemed to have lost their strength. Tyler shoved his friend. Tristan regained consciousness. He got up, he noticed Rory slowly get up from her seat. They didn't look at each other at all.

"Miss Gilmore I hope you can get Mr. Dugrey, to keep up at your speed," she smiled lightly as Rory grimaced a little. The bell rang before they reached their seats. Rory quickly threw her things in her bag and speeded her way out of the class room. The faster she walked the faster she could get to her locker and off to her next class. She almost had gotten lucky when Tristan was stopped by one of his groupies; to bad he was athletic as well. He was able to catch up to her as soon as she reached her locker. She turned the dial of her locker. Her heart began to beat faster, she pushed the lever up to open but nothing happened. She moved it furiously and still nothing happened. He was leaning against the next locker…smirking.

"Ya need my help Mary," his hands were in his pockets. She forced her self not to look at him.

"My name is Rory…I just figured out I don't need anything from my locker," she quickly turned and began to walk fast to her last class. This caught Tristan off guard, and he lost her in the crowd. He only has a chance to whisper, "Mary…" He let himself fall against the lockers. He placed his palm against his forehead. A million thoughts ran through his head. He was at his breaking point; his breath began to get ragged, his chest felt like it was about to explode. He felt his legs get week. The hall was getting empty and Tristan couldn't move an inch. He couldn't break down now, not here. He heard footsteps quickly approaching.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thank you to all of you that have reviewed. It means a lot to have my story liked.**_

Tyler found his friend fighting for a breath. He quickly got to him; he pulled him up against the locker.

"Breathe deeply," Tyler had pulled him forward a bit. Tristan tried to take the deep breath but all he got was a raspy cough.

"Calm down…" Tristan tried to force him self to stand. But he almost stumbled to the ground. "Tristan, it will be ok, you'll get to talk to her, this project is due next Friday," Tyler caught him across his chest. He knew exactly what was going on. When Tristan had hard core emotion, he felt it with every fiber of his being. He'd seen it before, when he tried so hard to be the child his parents wanted. Tyler was always the one who found him fighting for his breath crumbled on the ground. The last time he tried, there were tears in his eyes, Tyler knew his heart was shattered into a million pieces. It took him longer to walk it off, once around Tyler's back yard next door used to do the trick, but that day it took until the sun fell and the moon rose and the grasshoppers came alive. _"Still got my spot on the floor," _Tyler almost didn't hear him, until Tristan stopped and got out of Tyler's grasp. He was standing on his own two feet. But today he was falling again. He regained the color in his face and slowly regained his composure.

"I'm ok…" Tristan noticed his books were scattered on the floor he didn't remember dropping them. Tyler and Lasaro were the only two people Tristan kept real with. Tyler was Tristan's friend since elite preschool. Lasaro turned up in high class middle school, son of the richest rancher in Mexico. They moved for the better education, his father began ranching in Hartford as well, and his business was doing well, if not better then in Mexico. Lasaro just gave Tristan a good vibe, and he was right because Lasaro still has his trust. Other Hartford elite looked down upon him; he was one of the first Hispanics to intrude in the white sterilized society. He always tries to keep Tristan real, along with Tyler. But Tristan had an image to keep, the cocky, arrogant, egotistical, King of Chilton. The title was forced up on him once he stepped through the castle like doors of Chilton. Dugrey's…always kings; he heard it from his father so many times he couldn't help just living it. They stood there in silence; Tyler stood still waiting for Tristan to talk on his own. Tristan began to feel as though his heart echoed in the empty hall way. He faced the schools entrance doors.

"Since the day she walked through those doors," he pointed furiously at the doors. "She had me, she didn't even give me a chance to breathe, to pretend she wasn't there," he took a step forward and bowed his head. "She held my gaze and it's like she read me through and through, and saw me…not what everyone else sees." He looked at Tyler who had a look of remorse for his friend. What they both didn't notice was the amount of time they had actually spent in the hall. The bell startled them both into the present. Tyler then stepped forward.

"I know what you are actually capable of, let yourself be, go talk to her," Tyler said sincerely. "But don't leave us cooking in the sun," Tyler laughed as he walked away. As Tyler made his way to his locker he flashed back to an old memory.

"_Ok remind me again, why they hell I didn't just bring my own car?" Lasaro said angrily as he wiped the sweat from his brow. _

"_Because…"Tyler unbuttoned his shirt and took off his tie. "We all live on the same street, I next door, and you across the street, why waste gas when we can waste his," Tyler now wiped his face with the arm of his discarded blazer as he smirked._

"_It's like a billion degrees out here, damn that hoe he is doing right now!" Lasaro growled. "She's causing a major delay!" Lasaro shook his fist at the school. Tyler began to laugh._

"_Maybe we should go back inside and wait for him," Tyler picked up his bag and headed towards the building._

"_Well why you didn't suggest that in the beginning!" Lasaro said as he smacked Tyler's head and speeded ahead._

Rory was juggling with a couple of books trying to open her locker. Tristan then walked up.

"Mary…" he began. She was startled causing her to drop her books and fall against her locker causing her hand to crack against her locker.

"OW!" she cried.

"Mary!" Tristan took her hand from hers. He caressed the red spot spreading across her index finger and middle finger. "Come I have some Icy Hot in my gym bag," he tugged her slightly. But then he noticed all the scattered books. Without a word he quickly put some in her bag and picked up the last few. Rory watched in amazement as he swung her bag on to his left shoulder and grabbed three books in his left hand. He looked at her with sensitivity and offered his right hand. "I promise it will help it feel better, I am not up to anything else," he held up the hand he was offering and motioned her to follow him. Rory then noticed his groupies as she called them shooting death glares at her but what had amazed her the most was she was following him. She was allowing Tristan Dugrey to assist her, to touch her hand, what was she thinking. But as they neared his locker she realized…she was looking for the Tristan she saw in his eyes the first day of school. Tristan set her things on the ground and Rory continued to rub her fingers gently. It finally hit Rory, the funny side of things. She just hurt her fingers on her locker because she fell against it. She burst out laughing as Tristan had just pulled out the tube of Icy Hot. Rory finally paused in mid laugh.

"I just realized what a dope I was," she looked at her fingers. "How many people can say _I fell on my locker_?" she smiled widely. Tristan gave her his trademark smirk that made her knees weak.

"That's a good one Mary," he took her fingers in his hands and they both finally registered the shock that traveled between then. Tristan made sure not to look in her eyes for the fear he'd fall any deeper. Rory tried a quick change of subject.

"Why can't you just call me by my name?" Rory sighed.

"To me," Tristan began to rub the stuff on her fingers, "you will always be Mary." He looked up at her winked and smirked. Rory chuckled.

"Well since for the first time in months we're being civil," she began trying to ignore the nice affect he was giving her by tending to her wounded fingers, "how about we start discussing our project today?" But before he could answer his friends came by, the real ones as Rory liked to call them. She barely knew Lasaro, but Tyler she knew from her history class, he sat behind her and he always asked about the book of the week.

"Hey ya Rory, whatcha reading this week," Tyler smiled. "Whoa something happen here we should know about," pointing to her fingers.

"Hi Tyler," Rory gently removed her hand from Tristan's. Lasaro was holding back the laughs as Tristan glared at Tyler for breaking the moment. "First of all I'm reading My Sister's Keeper, not the usual type of book I read, but very interesting." Tyler nodded as she finished. "And these," she wiggled her fingers as she winced at the same time, "Well I fell on my locker," she smiled. Tyler began laughing and stopped when Tristan smacked his head.

"It's not funny, she got hurt," Tristan glared at him again.

"But…" he looked at Tristan.

"It's alright Tyler, I began laughing to when I realized what I did," she laughed.

"See, she thinks its funny," Tyler pointed towards her.

"Whatever, how about we all head out now, Rory how about you skip the bus today and ride with us, we'll stick Tyler in the trunk," Tristan slammed his locker shut and picked her stuff up again. She was about to protest when Tyler began leading her out.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Once again thanks to all those who have reviewed my story, I appreciate it a lot._**

"No, really…" Rory began as Tyler had led her to the flashy silver car.

"You, well we have a project we all need to work on, I need back up if I am ever going to get this done, I mean I don't think Yale accepts C's on report cards," he had paused in front of the passenger door to the BMW. Rory could help but to laugh.

"I wonder what the heck is taking them so long," Tyler said as he set his book bag on the floor. Back inside Tristan was dealing with some business as he liked to call it. Before he could follow Tyler and Rory out of the building Lasaro has stopped him and motioned behind him. There stood his lunch conquest with her arms crossed and tapping her foot eagerly. He handed off Rory's belongings, which he still held off to Lasaro.

"This will only take a sec," he sighed as he walked towards the blonde. He ran his hand through his hair as he stood in front of her.

"Hi…" Tristan looked back as Lasaro as he smirked and then back at the girl.

"Hey Trissy," he cringed as the nickname. "Well you see my parents are out of town, and well I'm having a party, you know on Smith street, and I was wondering if you'd like to go with me." She batted her eyes at him.

"Look uh…." He gestured at her to provide a name. She then pouted and said, "Crystal," she rolled her eyes. "Well I'll be there, but I can't be there with you I uh…" he slowly turned back to Lasaro who was now in range where he could hear every word they were saying.

"She actually waiting outside, we better go," he grabbed Tristan's arm and tugged him.

"Whoa that was a close one," Tristan mockingly wiped his brow.

"Man you got another one furious," Lasaro broke out into a hysterical laugh. Tristan just punched him as hard as he could.

"Ow you freaking ass hole," Lasaro grunted as he rubbed his bicep. "If I weren't injured I'd fight back!" Lasaro tried to redeem himself. Tristan then noticed Tyler and Rory laughing. There was a sudden fury erupting in him now, making his heart beat faster and his nerves send signals every which way.

"Well at least he hasn't killed her with his dumb jokes," Lasaro laughed as the neared the car they heard Tyler's begin to tell Rory one of his favorite jokes.

"Rory, how do you make a Kleenex dance?" Tyler leaned forward with anticipation.

"Um…" Rory smiled


	5. Chapter 5

_Thanks to all of those who have reviewed and have stayed with me. And if anyone wants to explain betaing to me and be one for me is welcome to talk to me about it. Here is a short update as I begin to get back into the swing of things._

Before Tyler could hit his punch line a hand covered his mouth and then hit him playfully on the shoulder.

"Really Ty, can you save your stupid joke for another time, I'm sure Rory here has had enough of it all!" Lasaro joked.

"Well if you and Tristan wouldn't have been still inside talking to-," Tyler began again but before he could finish another hand clamped down on his mouth hard.

"We didn't ask for your play by play of our days, so shut up!" Tristan glared at Tyler.

"Alright Rory, just so you know this constant abuse to my poor innocent self occurs constantly at every hour and everyday," Tyler sighed as he opened the back door for her. She felt like she was intruding in a private moment as she stood watching their intense banter occurring.

"Thanks Tyler," she practically whispered to him. Tyler just nodded as the others piled in as well. Tristan drove onto the main road as silence wove it self in the car.

"Just put a lil' boogie in it," he said to Rory.

"What?" her eyebrows furrowed together.

"That's how you make a Kleenex dance," Tyler smirked at her. You could hear a distinct slap coming from the front of the car.

"Oh…" Rory paused as she put everything back into context. Slowly a smile grew on her face and her blue eyes began to twinkle. She laughed quietly at the joke. Tyler's cheeks became a little red. Suddenly Lasaro broke into a laughter and Tristan with on hand on the steering wheel and the other against the window began to laugh as well. Tyler's face now resembled a tomato. He felt as though everyone was making fun of him now.

"Ok I'm done, drop me off here and I can call someone else to drive me home," Tyler his punched the car door. Rory's slender hand found its way on top of his clenched fist. Tyler looked at her and saw compassion in her eyes.

"Lighten up Ty, it just your jokes really are out there," Lasaro laughed. "I mean come on…a lil boogie?"

"Why did the cookie go to the doctor?" she smiled as she asked.

"Why?" Tyler broke out of his anger.

"Because it felt crummy…" she said with a small laugh. Tyler joined her in the end.

"Well, isn't everyone in this car full of jokes," Tristan said sarcastically.

"Come on play boy, don't you know any silly jokes?" Tyler said to him as he pulled himself together.

"Unlike all of you, I do not spend my time looking up stupid jokes," Tristan mumbled as he stopped at a red light.

"Come on Trissy boy this is going to be a long car ride if you do not contribute," Lasaro shoved him and the car moved a little.

"You wanna kill us you idiot?" Tristan brought the car back into the line.

"Tell a joke already!" Tyler smacked the back of his seat.

"What kind of water did Bruce Lee drink?" he said in a quiet voice.

"The audience back here can't here you," Tyler said as he smiled at Rory. Tristan repeated his line.

"What kind?" Lasaro rolled his eyes. After a silent moment Tristan finally answered.

"Watahhhh," he said with a mock karate chop. Again there was radio silence for what seemed like forever until Rory broke out into a gut laugh and tears sprung. The light turned green and they began to move once again. His friends were holding back but soon enough their laughs joined hers as well.


	6. Chapter 6

_Big thanks for the reviews; here goes a very itsy bitsy chapter to hold my loyal fans over…_

Silence has once again settled over the people sitting in the car. Lasaro had begun to fiddle around with the radio. Tristan focused his mind on driving rather than the girl sitting in his back seat. He glanced at the rearview mirror and watched Tyler's dark blond head turn towards Rory. A very hushed conversation began; one which made Rory smile. That was something he could never get enough of. Her smiles were enough to make the room seem to be filled with light. But there were those memories as he bantered with his dear Mary. Then there was the memory of her once upon a time 'bagboy.' The fight he had caused had caused poor 'bagboy,' to be old news. He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he missed the sight of a red light, he missed the sound of Lasaro's voice yelling at him to stop, he missed the sight of the truck that was about to clip them, he missed Tyler's terrified look as he looked across to Rory and saw the car heading straight in their direction. He held three lives and his own in that car; he was about to risk them all…


	7. Chapter 7

**_Thanks to LoVe23 for being my Beta, she is really awesome! Thank you all for your previous reviews! Here it is…_**

A distinct beeping sound echoed in the atmosphere. A male body lay covered in the white room. Bruises littered the male's arms and face. There was a gash just above his left eye. He groaned as he came to consciousness. He picked up his arms despite the pain that ran through them, caused by his movement. He tried to rub his eyes when a door banged open.

"Mr. Dugrey, I see that you're awake…" the voice came as he put his arms back down. He turned his head slowly and registered her face. Her young face and neat brunette hair set off a trigger in his mind.

"Where…Rory?" his raspy voice asked the nurse. She paused for a second to check his vitals before answering him.

"Hun, you gotta calm down," She advised as she watched his heart rate speed up. "I don't know a Rory, but the three people you were with are getting treated."

"Need to see her…" he said fighting down the cough that was crawling up his esophagus.

"Really Mr. Dugrey, you are in no condition to be up, you lacerated three ribs on the right side of your ribcage, you cut your right arm pretty badly, and we had to treat you for a collapsed lung. Sorry to say, but you _will_ be here for awhile." She said, trying to calm him down. Slowly Tristan shook his head no.

"I need to know she is o…k," he let a cough out. His heart rate began to spike again.

"Tristan you need to calm down," she said, setting her cool hands on his face. "They are all being treated by the finest doctors here and I will notify you as soon as I hear anything," she smiled lightly as she then put her hands in her pocket.

"I am Nurse Sheila and I will be watching over you today, ok? So if you need anything just hit the call button," she set the remote next to his hand. "Try to get some sleep," with that she walked out. 'No…' he thought. He could not stay there, he needed to see Rory, and he needed to know she was alright. He swung his legs over to the side of the bed and slowly sat up. He felt his head swim and his vision waver. Suddenly memories came flooding back into his mind. Ironically, he now heard Lasaro's voice telling him to hit the breaks, he heard Tyler's voice telling him the same, and he saw Rory's face become horror stricken as she saw the car coming towards them. Tristan didn't stop fast enough…he didn't stop where he should've. His confidants…where were they? As he stood he felt a draft from behind. He grabbed the bed sheet on his bed and wrapped him self in it. He took his first agonizing steps since he could remember. As each foot moved waves of pain shot all over his body. There were no windows in his room; that gave him an advantage. The coldness of the hospital floor threatened to weaken his legs; but Tristan Dugrey had an objective, the girl with the eyes. He reached for the door knob; this was the first time he noticed how badly his hands were scratched as well. He closed his eyes and took a deep, painful breath; he'd deal with that later. Slowly and silently he cracked his door open. He peered through the crack and tried to focus his vision. Oddly his eyes took some time to adjust.

"Mila, its noon, how bout some lunch?" he heard the familiar voice of nurse Sheila ask another nurse whose post was right outside his door. He waited a few agonizing seconds until they had both left the area. He opened the crack a little wider and noticed that the hospital personnel in charge of the floor were making rounds because he saw a whole group standing in the room further down the hall. He stepped out of his room and quickly tried to find any means of escape. He took his path down the almost abandoned hall way. He slipped pass some people coming to visit their loved ones. He noticed, as he walked past, that none of the nurses were calling out to him. As he walked further down the hall a handy sign pointed to elevators and he quickly went into one. As the elevator doors closed, he realized that he had no idea where to find Rory. The elevator began to move and Tristan frantically pushed random buttons. But with no avail, the elevator descended and opened on the first floor. He pushed him self into the furthest corner of the elevator, away from public view, causing him to wince. He closed his eyes and bit his already split lip hard. He knew there was no such thing as invisibility but hoped to God that no one would recognize him as a patient that belonged in his room.

"Tristan?" a soft voice said. The elevator doors closed with a soft thump. Tristan opened his eyes too see the sad looking face of Tyler Bennington. His arm was in a sling and cast to his mid fingers. There was a bunched up piece of fabric in his hand and from the looks of it, it came from his arm that was not in a cast. Suddenly Tyler stepped forward and hugged Tristan tightly. "Thank God you are ok," he murmured softly. Tristan brought his hands around his long time friend. He felt the pain escalate around his mid section.

"Where is Rory?" Tristan gasped, as he let go. Tyler turned to the elevator buttons and smiled sadly.

"Good thing for these handy markers," he said as he hit the button for floor eight, Neurological. Tristan licked his dry cut lips and took a deep breath. He felt as if he tried to swallow a watermelon whole. The elevator began its path back up. "So I have the feeling that you escaped from your room," Tyler stood next to Tristan as the elevator stopped at a floor to let more people in. Tristan nodded mutely. "How bad is it?" Tyler asked now noticing the array of bruises and cuts that littered his friend's body.

"I…" he cleared his throat, "will be fine."

"Ok…" Tyler stood next Tristan silently. "We have to find Lasaro, I haven't heard anything about him."

"How…" Tristan began.

"How did I find out about Rory?" Tyler said looking down at his hurt arm. He adjusted his sling. "I overheard the nurses, I wanted to see her and come back and tell you once I found you, but it seems as though you beat me to the punch," Tyler smirked. Tristan looked over at him with his somber blue eyes. He noticed a large gash adorning his face, from his cheek down to his chin.

"You're ok, right?" Tristan said with a small cough.

"I am." He said slowly, "And I'll be even better when we're all accounted for and are in good health," Tyler said as he bit back a piece of information that he had yet to inform Tristan. His eyes looked at the other people that joined them in the journey up the elevator. Tristan just nodded his head as he leaned against the wall of the elevator.

Meanwhile Rory was having a flashback to that morning. Unbeknownst to anyone her mother was having the same flashback.

_"Mom," Rory took a bite of her pop tart. Her mom took a sip of her coffee as she picked up the pile of papers marked with a post it note, 'inn business.'_

_"Yeah Hon," she took a seat across from her daughter._

_"I love you."_

_"I love you too honey, are you ok?"_

_"Yeah, I just felt like I needed to say it."_

Lorelei Gilmore sat at her kitchen table waiting for her daughter to arrive. After that morning's scene she couldn't get the feeling that something wrong was going on with her daughter. As the memory faded her phone rang. She took a quick sip of her coffee and ran to the phone. Unfortunately, she misplaced the phone, having hid it trying to avoid her mother's calls from the previous week. She looked in her living room frantically and found no sign of it. She quickly ran back to the base of the phone and hit the speaker button.

"Hello, I am looking for Lorelei Leigh Gilmore's mother," a woman's voice boomed from the small device.

"This is she," Lorelei said loudly.

"This is Hartford Hospital calling…." Those were the words a mother never wanted to hear ever in her life. She quickly grabbed her keys and was out the door before the woman finished speaking, and without hanging up the phone. __


	8. Chapter 8

_**A BIG THANKS TO LoVe23 for all her help!**_

_**THANK YOU TO ALL OF MY LOYAL REVIEWERS!**_

The ride up the elevator seemed to take forever. Tyler was worried about what Tristan's reaction would be and how it would affect him. He glanced over at him, and watched as Tristan tapped his hand, in an agitated fashion, on his leg, as he watched the numbers light up. He knew he was being very vague, and normally, Tristan could read him and would press him on what he was hiding. Thankfully, Tristan's need to find Rory, kept him from noticing Tyler's hesitance.

When they finally reached their destination, Tristan, being so anxious, was about to get out of the elevator without any worries. A hand on his elbow stopped him. He turned to face Tyler, with a slight wince and saw him shaking his head.

"You forget this place is guarded like a fortress, we are not family or even have the right to see her yet." Tyler said quietly to him.

"Then how are we supposed to get to her!" He said in a harsh whisper.

"Follow me and _please_ be calm." Tyler answered him as he looked both ways before exiting the elevator, then leading them down the hall. At the end of the hall there were a couple of signs.

"Step down…Cardio…ok here it is Neurological…we have to keep right." Tyler said as he led Tristan down another set of halls. Tristan paid no attention to what Tyler was saying, or to the signs of each ward, leading them here and there. He wanted to see Rory and that was his main objective. Understanding would come later. Tyler sighed and bit his lip as he realized he had to tell Tristan what was going on, and soon. Tristan was steps ahead of him. As they neared the general area, Tyler noticed the large desk with attending nurses and the flow of sick people walking around the desk. He quickly stepped beside Tristan and held his elbow.

"What are you _doing_!" Tristan glared at him as he tried to get his arm out of Tyler's grip.

"Just shut up and walk towards the double doors!" Tyler hissed. He felt Tristan's struggle stop and nodded silently at nothing but the air in front of himself. No one stopped the duo as they passed into the other side of the doors. Tyler inwardly winced as he noticed another band of nurses as soon as they walked in. While he was worrying about what to do, Tristan spoke up. He was looking to his right, where under the room number 814, there was a sloppy scrawl that read: _Lorelei Gilmore._

"Right here, Ty!" Tristan said eagerly, and before Tyler could stop him, he opened the door and stepped into the room. Tyler walked in behind him and felt his stomach drop. She was worse off than he thought. Every piece of exposed skin was littered with bruises. Tristan quickly went to her side. "Mary… oh Mar… I'm _so_ sorry." He said quietly, his voice breaking slightly. He hung his head, unable to look at her.

"_Tristan_…" Tyler said softly. Tristan looked up again but not at Tyler.

"Mary…you _need_ to open your eyes and tell me you _forgive_ me…" He said as his eyes began to water.

"She's in a _coma_ Tristan!" Tyler finally blurted out. 'There, I said it!' He thought to himself, taking a deep breath and looking up at the ceiling. The weight from his shoulders left, but quickly settled in his gut the minute he looked back down. Before him, his best friend was slumped over, barely able to hold himself up from the sobs wracking his body, clinging tightly to the hand of the girl who held his heart.


	9. Chapter 9

_BIG Thanks to my Beta!!! She rocks (LoVe23)! Thanks to all those who continue to read my story._

Tears were something Tristan Dugrey never allowed himself the liberty of. For a man to shed tears were a form of weakness. Tears were a form of emotion, and he was taught to be above showing any kind of emotion. Especially, if it showed weakness in front of an opponent. Now however, he felt weak. Now, he cried. He cried hard, gut wrenching sobs from deep within his heart. The rapidly beating heart that belonged to her.

His body was aching, his head was spinning, he felt like he was losing his equilibrium, and his heart was breaking. He always new that it would hurt to have your heart broken, but he thought it was an emotional pain. He didn't think it would affect him physically. He felt incapacitated by sorrow. It felt like some one was tearing his heart into pieces with their bare hands. She laid their motionless and he new deep inside that this was his fault. He should have known better then to let his mind stray from the road. She was lost to the world because of this.

Tyler did not know what do. All he could do was watch. His heart was torn. He wanted to reach out and comfort his friend, but didn't want to intrude on what he felt was a private moment. Yet at the same time didn't want Tristan to think that he didn't care what was happening to him. It hurt Tyler too much, seeing his best friend in this state. He took a deep breath and bent down to where Tristan had collapsed in his grief, clutching to the side of Rory's bed.

"You could have never known that car was going to hit us." he put a hand on Tristan's shaking shoulder.

"I…I…was the stupid idiot who took my eyes off the road!" he said in violent loud whisper.

"What about the other idiot who didn't brake?!" he snapped. "All the other cars hit their brakes!"

Tristan reached up and gripped her hand tightly and let his head fall. His sobbing finally stopped and only silent tears were left behind. The room was now filled with the hiccups that usually follow a good long cry.

Tyler's tense hand seemed to loosen its hold on Tristan's shoulder. Tristan looked up slowly at Rory's sleeping form. His face was red and his tear streaks were drying. His body was emotionally drained and literally in pain.

"It is all over from here…over…" He muttered, his eyes in a daze. Tyler's head, snapped around to face Tristan.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, confused by Tristan's rambling.

"I stepped outside the line one too many times…my father warned me…no…he _ordered_ me not to do anything to upset him, one more thing and I would be gone…finito…" Tristan's voice trailed off.

"But you haven't done anything!" Tyler exclaimed, frustrated by Tristan's defeated stance.

"Well nothing that _you_ know about…" Tristan muttered, finally turning to face his friend.

"Well I _have_ heard things, but I mean they're just rumors you helped pushed forward…right?" Tyler asked, afraid to hear Tristan's answer.

"I wish they _were_ just rumors." He whispered, shaking his head, looking down at the floor he was still kneeling on. Tyler just stared at him in surprise. After a minute or two, Tyler broke the silence.

"So racing?" He stated, more than asked.

"Yup." Tristan answered simply.

"You totaled two cars just to win?" Tyler asked, his voice rising.

"Unfortunately." Tristan answered, nodding his head.

"So you really were into that Fast and Furious, Tokyo Drift and shit." Tyler asked, looking at Tristan as though he were a stranger. The boy he thought he knew so well, just chuckled.

"So all the rumors were in fact truths. The girls, the danger and the booze…." Tyler listed off, still not willing to believe.

"You have to numb the pain somehow." Tristan said, sadly.

"_Hey_! What about me and Lasaro?" Tyler asked, hurt by Tristan's last statement.

"The two of you, mean too much to me to have to burden you with my stupidity." He said, looking up at Tyler, with a small, sad smile.

"Well you think too little of us!" Tyler spat out. He was suddenly too angry to even sit there anymore. He stood and left the room without a goodbye.

"Well there you go Rory." Tristan said, as he slowly stood. He took a deep breath and pulled his sheet tighter around his body. He didn't hear the door to the room open again. He never even sensed Lorelai's presence.

"I have failed another person that means something to me." he said tiredly as he rubbed his eyes. "I can say sorry a millions times, beg for forgiveness on my knees until they bleed, but I will never be able to right this wrong." He said, trying to hold back the sob that was threatening to come out. "I was just so psyched that you were finally talking to me after so many failed attempts." He continued, in a voice that conveyed his excitement from earlier. He looked at the hand he was holding and slowly, trying not to disturb the tubes and wires, laced their fingers together. He looked at their hands, blinking back tears as he stroked her fingers.

Lorelai stood by the door, listening to the young man who seemed to be so captivated by his daughter. Tristan stood there, completely unaware that anyone else was in the room. All he saw was Rory. He continued to talk as though no one else was around.

"I know it was wrong of me…no, it was stupid of me to treat you with the wrong words. But no one ever taught me how to treat a girl. Especially someone you were actually interested in. I never knew what love was, or how to even treat that person, I swear." He exclaimed, practically begging. Almost wishing his words would wake her up so she could let him know it was ok. Sadly nothing happened, so he continued on. "But then I met _you_ Rory, the moment I saw you…something inside me came alive."

He chuckled, remembering the first day she came to Chilton. "It scared me Rory, so bad that I did what I always knew how to do…treat you like everyone else in that school." He shook his head ruefully. "It was the biggest mistake I could have done, you deserved to meet _me_ not the person everyone saw. The first moment I cornered you, it was as if you could almost see it and it is my fault that it all went wrong." he leaned down a bit and caressed her cheek. "But you taught me something without really realizing it…true love Rory."

He smiled looking at her face. Even though it was bruised and bandaged, she still managed to look beautiful. "I was so happy you had accepted the ride, it felt like I was getting a step closer to where I wanted to be with you, I wanted to show you the other side of me, the side that is truthful and has…well _had_ true friends, and when we were driving home, I became even happier that you were so comfortable with them and I enjoyed the moment a little too long." he leaned closer and kissed her forehead.

"I am so sorry. When you wake up, I hope you will receive my letters." when he turned to leave he almost fell flat on his butt. Lorelai stood before him with an unreadable expression upon her face. Tristan opened his mouth but nothing came out. A lone tear ran down her face. But before anyone got the courage to speak, the door opened. "Tristan, lets go, your father is waiting for you." at the door stood his grandfather with a somber look. Someone must have found out he was in this room and told him. Tristan let his head fall as he started to head to the door.

"Wait!" Lorelai grabbed his arm roughly. She walked to the table by the window and opened a bag. She pulled out a navy ribbon. He recognized it right away. She took his arm and wrapped the ribbon around his wrist.

"Remember what you have done." she stared him right in the eyes. Dried tear streaks still apparent on her face. "I know deep in your heart you care for her, so change for her, change to become someone worthy of her attention." She slowly let go of his wrist. "Prove me wrong boy, prove to me all those moments that you took it upon yourself to treat her badly, were your ways of showing you actually liked her." She turned and gazed at her daughter. She lightly said, "Don't make me regret…" Tristan felt a terrible clench in his stomach. He swore his heart had just traveled to his ears. His grandfather cleared his throat to get their attention.

"Let's go Tristan, my condolences Ms. Gilmore, may your daughter have a speedy recovery. I will be keeping in touch through your parents," he took Tristan's arm. Lorelai just stood there and never made a motion to indicate that she had heard anything. Tristan let his grandfather walk him out of the room. He was seen by his family doctor and given some clothes to change into after a quick shower. His doctor told his to let his ribs heal for at least a week more.

His grandfather handed him a letter and led him to the Town Car that was waiting to take him away. He took Tristan's face in his hands. "Stay out of trouble," he murmured and then hugged him and kissed the top of his head. Janlan's actions caused Tristan to relive some childhood memories.

He reluctantly got into the car and was met by a blast of cold air. He sat alone in the backseat. The cold leather irritating his sore muscles. He rubbed the goose bumps that scattered across the surface of his arms as he stared out the window. He never even had a chance to grab his jacket nor had he been offered one. His eyes stayed glued to the passing scenery as his hands folded and unfolded the letter his grandfather passed on to him. His eyes burned from minutes gone without blinking. He dared not to, for fear of tears falling. He ran his hand down his arm to his wrist where he felt the navy ribbon that was tied there. _Her_ ribbon…the one that held her hair from falling into her face that day. Lorelai's words still rang in his ears.

"_Don't make me regret…"_

He had done so many things that he regretted…but now was time to change it…to do something about it.

Tyler paced the hospital room as Lasaro watched quietly. Lasaro had a bandage over his right eye, his arm was in a splint and under the covers were some pretty bad looking legs. His eyes followed Tyler left and right, left and right, left and right…he began to get dizzy.

"Ok stop!!" Lasaro yelled as he closed his eyes and tried to rid the burning feeling. Tyler stopped abruptly.

"Tell me now what is going on!" Lasaro asked in a tired voice.

"He…he….he is just soooo damn ignorant!" Tyler had resumed pacing, now however, he was also ranting and flailing his arms around to emphasis his displeasure.

"Ty if you don't tell me what is going on I swear to you, I will get up off this bed and _hurt_ you!" Lasaro said menacingly.

"Sorry…sorry…it's just that he makes me so mad!" Tyler said angrily. Tears were threatening to fall from his eyes. "Rory…sweet Rory, she's in a coma." Lasaro gasped at this and held his hand at his mouth.

"No way…no fucken damn way!" He exclaimed.

"Yes way! When I was getting treated I heard the nurses talking, I heard them saying she hit her head hard…hard enough to really get hurt. As soon as I found out where she was, I took Tristan to go see her." He rubbed his face. "That's when he told…he told me about all the rumors that were going around about him. He told me they were actually true." He said, still clearly surprised.

"Yeah…I kind of figured." Lasaro answered, not as shocked by the news as his friend. He watched Tyler as he absently rubbed his arm.

"…he made it seem like we weren't worth it to help him." Tyler complained.

"I kind of see why he thinks like that, think about it. We know what his life was like. Before he met us, he really only had himself to rely on and trust." Lasaro pointed out.

"Did he forget about us?" Tyler asked softly, calming down from his tirade.

"No, I just think he was backed too far into a corner and too scared to actually reach out to us." Lasaro shrugged.

"Wow can this be anymore after school special?" Tyler chuckled, trying to lighten the decidedly glum mood.

"It's reality…" Lasaro shrugged, looking down in his lap.

"Do you think they're really sending him away?" Tyler asked, concerned.

"If he said that all those rumors were true, and he did do all those things, and knowing his father…I am guessing he is on his way out of Hartford as we speak…" Lasaro said, looking up to meet his friend's eyes. He was sure the concerned look on Tyler's face was a look that was mirrored in his own.


	10. Chapter 10

_**BIG THANKS TO MY GREAT BETA LoVe23!! Sorry for the long wait!**_

Janlan Dugrey sat in his study, the only light coming from the moon that barely peeked through the curtains. He stared at the door that faced him willing his eyes to not let tears fall. He stayed still, fearing that any movement may cause may cause him to lose the control he barely had on his nerves. He closed his eyes finally…feeling the burn against his old blue eyes. Blue eyes that closely resembled his grandsons. He shook his head to try to clear his thoughts. He did not know what was worse; having his son push off his grandson like some broken toy or the news he heard just a few hours ago.

"_Mister Dugrey, I have some bad news…" the young doctor had such a sorrowful face that Janlan thought that he was about to cry._

"_What is it Doctor Anderson?" Janlan asked, hoping, that it was not as serious as it seemed._

"_If you could please just call your son in please?" he said still not looking him straight in the eyes. He knew he should have called the regular doctor…but Doctor Anderson was closer to the family, he knew he would come if he asked, and John was just going to take Tristan and throw him on a plane, anyway. He let Doctor Anderson know as much._

"_What do you mean?" Dr. Anderson asked, finally looking up at him. "He should be in bed resting… just taking it easy for and extended period of time!"_

"_His father had other priorities, but I assure you I am Tristan's guardian as of today." Janlan replied dryly. Not sure if his irritation was from the doctor still not having told him what was wrong with Tristan or at John for the way he's handling things with his child._

"_But what about his treatments?!" Dr. Anderson asked in shock. Janlan was shocked by this question. However, the only indication he showed was by quirking his eyebrow in question._

"_I wasn't aware of any '_treatments_'. Regardless…" Janlan replied, with a wave of his hand. "Whatever treatments you were prescribing will have to be put on hold. I'm sure Tristan will be able to take care of him self in the meantime." In his mind, the words 'he always has' lingered, but remained unspoken._

"_With all due respect sir…" Dr. Anderson replied indignantly._

"_Just tell me damn it!" Janlan yelled, finally losing his patience._

"_I sorry sir! But I can't tell you unless Tristan or your son are present!" the young doctor persisted._

"_Will you just spit it out already!" Janlan stood abruptly feeling pains run through his aged body. "He's gone! Alright? He will not be in contact for _four months_… four months without a single hello, do you want to wait that long?!" he sat feeling his legs groan in relief. "Please…just tell me already…" he said sighing in defeat._

_The doctor walked behind the large mahogany desk and from the immense bookcase of files and folders; he managed to pull out a large yellow envelope and place it on the desk. He then pulled out a black film and turned to place it on the light box a few steps from his desk. Janlan got up to follow him and watched as the doctor hesitated and then slowly began to place the film in the holders. The picture was still indecipherable. The doctor took a deep breath and switched on the light. The first thing Janlan saw was his grandson's name on the corner and then his eyes moved to the picture. There was a chest cavity, he saw his ribs were intact except for two dark marks that indicated the rib injury as they had told him before; but what was new too him were the series of spots that covered the area…like shrapnel. Janlan's brows furrowed in confusion, trying to figure out what the dark spots were. Dr. Anderson saw the look on his face and let out a deep, regretful sigh._

"_It's cancer…" the doctor said softly. _


	11. Chapter 11

_**Wow…all I got to say is thanks to my beta LoVe23…without her…there would be so many errors. Thanks to all my loyal readers as well. You stuck through this story and I am going to try my hardest to update more often.**_

He waited anxiously for himself to wake up from this nightmare, but the more he hoped the more he realized this was all reality. He blinked letting the breath he'd been holding go. A stinging sensation spread itself across his chest. His breathing started to become ragged…

_She had been dreaming…because come on, no one can fly. She felt the wind graze her face and her fingers play with the breezes. But suddenly her vision wavered and she felt a hard surface beneath her. She cracked an eye open…but her sight was still sleep ridden. She slowly pushed her self up into a sitting position. She rubbed her eyes and when she opened them again, she saw Stars Hallow. She slowly stood and looked around. She felt the fear begin to grow inside her stomach. The town was empty without a soul in sight. The fear was now gnawing at her insides. She noticed she was bare feet when she took the first step and that's when she looked fully at herself. She was in white sundress; she pulled on the fabric seriously confused. But before she could examine it more; a headache came bringing tears to her eyes from the intensity. She ran blindly hoping her legs would take her home. No sound came to her ears but the sound of blood pulsating through her head. _

Tristan took slow steps feeling his chest burn. The sun shined ironically right above his head. He bit his lip as he felt a shock of pain splinter across his chest. His bag was dropped at his feet. He looked up at his driver to say goodbye; but before he could the driver had already turned and walked back to his car. Tristan shook his head. He was going to reach down for his bag when he noticed a foreign phone sitting on top of it. He furrowed his brow in confusion as he picked up the sleek black object. It began to vibrate in his hands and by reflex he checked the name first. He recognized that number—and by god he did not feel like talking to his father right now… or ever. He picked up his bag and slipped the phone into his pocket. As he made his way to the doors, he felt the phone give a lasting vibration. It signaled to him that he had a voicemail; he couldn't believe that his father would actually leave a voice mail for the first time in his life. He chuckled as he opened the castle like doors.

_She felt the familiar grass underneath her feet. Memories of dancing and butterfly wings came to mind. She slowly made her way up the rickety steps. The first one she felt the splinters begin to cut into her feet. She tried to open her sore eyes. Little by little she moved her eyelids and felt the burn against her cranium. Tears began to pool in her eyes again. The door began to open and she looked up hopefully. Her mother's tired eyes looked at her. She smiled sadly when she noticed her._

"_Rory…baby……" she reached out to her. Rory closed her eyes again and let her self take in the feeling of her mother's sweet embrace. When she opened her eyes again the pain was gone. But another vision surprised her…she now stood in the old family home… the old shed at the Independence Inn. Her mother lost years to her appearance now… the laugh lines were gone…the small crows feet were gone… she was once again, the young single mother. _

"_I'm sorry…." Her mother's eyes would not stop tearing. "I'm so sorry baby."_

"_Mom," she cried; "What's going on…"_

"_I'm so sorry baby; you deserve so much more…" she shook her head furiously. "I wanted you out of there though… I wanted you far from all that made me feel invisible in my own home." She dropped to her knees and grabbed her head letting the sobs rack her body. Rory followed her to the ground. "I wanted to give you a family honey." _

"_But you did mommy, please don't cry!" She exclaimed, reaching out to her mother._

"_I'm so sorry baby…I'm so sorry…" The young Lorelai continued to sob._

"_Mom, no you are wonderful…you're everything to me!" Rory cried out._

_She looked up at Rory with serious eyes. _

"_Honey…that's why….that's why I will only love you…I won't love again…not anyone…not ever…" Lorelai said with a determined look in her eye._

"_Mom…" Rory whispered, taken aback._

"_Luke…Luke understands…" she nodded sadly. Something ticked in Rory's mind…something she finally understood…_

_She went to hug her mother again and closed her eyes to feel that same feeling she had a moment ago. But it was someone else she was hugging…someone else's homey smell. This person smelled of breakfast food and coffee…especially coffee. _

_She opened her eyes again, the shock of pain ran through her head again…_

_Luke smiled a lopsided smile at her. _

"_I'm glad you're happy now?" he walked behind the counter…Rory looked oddly up at him. "Your mother…" For a moment Rory saw his eyes fill with love, but then the sad smile returned. "Your mother told me the news…over coffee…" Luke put the rag down…the look returned… "Stuffs gonna hurt her…" he took his cap off and ran his hand through his hair… "I love you two…if you ever need……" he bit his lip. "If you ever need anything…" Rory stepped closer too him feeling his heartbreak._

In Rory's dream world mere minutes passed. But in reality it was already day two of Tristan's imprisonment. His squadron had been running the obstacle course. Currently, they were going over the wall climbing section, over and over. The sergeant really had it in for him.

Here men were meant to be left behind… As Tristan made his way up the wall he glanced down to see his roommate losing his grip. One of his hands slipped. Tristan quickly reached down and grabbed it. This kept him from falling but Tristan was another story. He lost his equilibrium and with the force he used to keep his balance he felt pain shoot through his chest as he grabbed onto the wall again.

His breath began to get short as they reached the top. As they made it down the other side he felt the sweat burn his eyes making his vision waver even more then it already was. The finish line was steps away. He had to keep going for only just a minute more. The pain was becoming more and more apparent. It felt like his lungs were going to tear right through his chest. Short bursts of breath were all he had left. But as soon as the squadron was all at the finish line the whistle sounded.

"Do it again DuGrey…" Tristan was in so much pain he knew if he looked up at him the pain would intensify.

"Do-it-a-gain!" the order came again. Everyone new better than to argue…no one wanted to earn his punishment. Tristan slowly nodded and made his was over to the wall. He grabbed onto the rope and awaited the signal. He knew the faster he could get this done the sooner he could rest. The signal came and he swore that it echoed 20 times louder in his ears. His chest burned…burned so bad he didn't know how long he would last. He begged his legs to push harder than before. Thankfully he made it…he made it…

"You call that a good run?!" the voice was screaming right by his ear. The black corners in his vision began to merge into the middle. His roommate saw him waver and became concerned.

"Sir!" he stepped forward.

"Was I talking to you maggot!?" The Sergeant yelled, in barely contained rage.

"But sir, he doesn't look good!" he ran forward. "Tristan?" The blackness won…Tristan let himself be taken away…he was so tired, so damn tired and the burning in his chest wouldn't stop.


	12. Chapter 12

As usual I don't own anything except my made up characters!

Thanks to my beta LoVe23; always coming through for me! Thank You!

Thank you faithful readers!

* * *

She knew Tristan was capable of love…he loved his grandfather. He showed it from a young age. Janlan always made sure that every ounce of his attention was on him. In return Tristan loved the man with every fiber of his being.

"_Come on spit fire…your grandfather is waiting…" she picked up the six year old. _

"_Granddad!" he jumped in her arms and she laughed trying to keep him still. _

"_How can you still have so much energy spit fire, you've been running around the yard for hours?" she sat him on the bathroom counter and turned on the faucet for the sink. _

"'_Cause I'm a spit fire?" he tilted his head as he answered. She laughed as she wiped the smudges from his face. _

"_Yes you are and maybe _because_ you're going to see your grandfather?" she smiled. _

"_Granddad!" he pumped his arms again. _

She remembered when he was twelve. She smiled sadly at the memories as they began to float back into her mind. He was growing into his good looks as perfect as she thought he would. His blue eyes would always be sparkling with life and mischief as he talked animatedly to her.

"_They all look at me like I am some god or something," he laughed as he shrugged. "I don't get it…I mean I am just like everyone else…" she chuckled along with him. The boy was still young and he didn't realize that the looks and the financial status of his life were going to get him in trouble._

"_It's those baby blues of yours," she smiled as she took his face in her hands. "But don't let it get to your head," she reached out to him and took him in his arms. "Alright my little spit fire; time to get ready for school." She kissed his forehead. _

"_Aw come on no kisses…" he smiled as he playfully wiped at his forehead. She laughed and couldn't help but to grab him in a hug and shower him with kisses._

"_Ahhh," he laughed as he struggled to get free. The musical sound of his laughter a sound she would never forget._

She sighed as she set down an antique picture frame and picked up the next one. The forced portrait on his thirteenth birthday…

_He stared at himself in the mirror. He sighed as he tugged on the tie and reopened some buttons on his shirt. He was about to run his fingers through his side parted hair when a voice made him jump._

"_Don't you dare spit fire…"she reprimanded him as she walked up to him. She made him turn to her and he simply rolled his eyes as he smirked. "How many times have I told you to not use that smirk," she cocked her eyebrow at him. That only caused him to smirk even more. She began to button his collar and tightened his tie again. "Your grandfather has been away on business for too long and has missed seeing your face," she said as she began adjusting his jacket. "Your father is following tradition…every birthday equals a portrait" She blew the hair out of her eyes. As she studied his expressions she added, "How else am I supposed to catalog your innocence?" she pouted. _

"Innocence_?" he scoffed. Tristan laughed as he shook his head. His hand was reaching up to his hair again. But again it was stopped by another hand. _

"_Don't touch!" she glared at him and slapped his hand. _

Good memories with Tristan were plentiful. He was capable of so many things and not everyone has been able to see the Tristan she knows. But she has seen him at his lowest as well.

_She was nervously pacing the foyer. Back and forth…window to window…the grandfather clock mockingly sounded. She glanced at the clock for the thirtieth time 3:15am and the seconds keep running. That's when she heard it… she heard the sounds she had been waiting for. Someone stumbled and voices laughed and jeered. A car screeched out of the driveway. She quickly ran to the door and yanked it open. Tristan was leaning against the wall and a bottle loosely gripped in his hand. She ran to him and took the bottle out of his hands. She quickly jumped back expecting a harsh reaction and she got it._

"_What the hell do you think you're doing?" he whipped at her. She dropped the bottle as he stumbled again. She took him in her arms and he tried to push her away. "Stop…stop…" but his damn eyes wouldn't let him see straight. _

"_Tristan…my little spit fire…" her voice croaked. Tristan stiffened and looked at her from the crook of her neck. He slowly stood straight; keeping an arm on her. _

"_I'm sorry…I'm so sorry," he said as tears filled his eyes. She shook her head and just went about her task like many other nights- mornings technically. His arm over her shoulder and hers around his waist; letting him lean against her. They made their way to his room. She helped him change and made him brush his teeth. With her guidance he finally made it to his bed. She tucked him in knowing he had no fight in him. She kneeled by his bed and took his hand in hers. She brushed his hair back from his eyes. He eyelids drooped as he still murmured, "I'm sorry." She just nodded and kissed his forehead. His lips finally began to slow. He was doing it more often and later would make sure to recover with his friends…the two boys that were his blessing._

"_One day you will see… one day you will see that all these lies will consume you. You can't live like this. You weren't meant to be THAT guy. My little spit fire… you were meant for much greater things." She wiped the tears from her eyes. "I love you spit fire…try… please just try a little harder." She stood and leaned down to give him one last kiss. Then he said a few words she would never forget in her life and yet tore her heart to shreds._

"_I love you mom…" he said as he turned on his side. She gripped on to the door jambs as much has her hand would let her. She tried to slow her rapidly beating heart. Tears began to fall from her eyes again. She wiped them as she made her way down the stairs and back to her room. In the morning he wouldn't remember…he wouldn't remember what he said…_

A lone tear ran down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away as she continued to run her fingers over the picture frames. She missed him so much…she almost cried in front of his father when she heard the news. There was still a large whole in her heart not knowing how he was after the car crash. Knowing he was away opened the wound only more. She took a deep breath and continued to clean his furniture. She pushed back the memories in her mind and continued to do her job. Because that was what Hope Clearwater was…hired help…


	13. Chapter 13

HELLO my fellow readers!! I have not given up!! Ha-ha. Thank you to my beta LoVe23; she does wonders!

Tristan laid there, his body shaking uncontrollably, as he recounted the past few days. He felt his chest close up, and he couldn't breathe. If he could have laughed he would have. The day before Tristan's only worry was; how the hell was he going to survive something that he's never known? He's never really known any real discipline. He was Tristan Dugrey no one ever told him what to do but his father. How…how was he going to learn to be what he needed to be? Tristan realized he was going to have to give into the moment and immerse himself in something that he never would do… willingly. He spent his days fighting every comeback that would naturally slip from his mouth. He never saw himself as a 'Yes Sir' type of guy. He was currently being trashed for the navy ribbon that hasn't moved an inch from his wrist.

_Rory's dreams were only getting worse. Rory fell through the hug she believed she was giving Luke. She stumbled onto the halls of Chilton. Someone was really playing a sick joke on her. Her mind and soul couldn't take it anymore. She ran through the halls in the attempt to find the doors._

Tristan felt like this was the end, a way to pay for all his sins in a sense. If he could smirk in his state he was in… he would. But those damn black edges that were crowding his eyes seemed more bearable than the cornucopia of feelings that were brewing in his gut. The voices around him were all becoming a distant annoying buzz. Maybe…the thought crawled into his head…maybe he could just let it all go and give in. The darkness may have its perks and all this act could just stop. The world would be better off without him; his friends would be better off without him. But flashes of memories halted his thoughts. There were a myriad of faces that flashed through his conscious. He was never one to give in and let it all go. So why was he letting everything play out so easily. He was damned if he was going to let his body take over…Tristan Dugrey was always in control. He pushed himself into a sitting position. He pushed back the black and opened his eyes to the blurry reality. Hands were trying to push him back down and voices urged him to calm down.

One of the voices he now recognized was Jamie, one of his bunkmates, who was kneeling beside him. The other was a medic, trying to check his vitals. Tristan pushed the hands off.

"I'm fine," he coughed. "…so leave me the hell alone," he stood weakly on his feet. Fire burned through his body as he got his limbs to move. His tormentor, began to reach his hand out to stop him. "Don't…_touch_…me!" he growled. The new emotion caused vertigo. He walked away from the crowd hoping that he would somehow be able to get one foot in front of the other. He made his way through the gravel paths hoping the sounds would help guide him. His breathing was becoming heavier and his vision was wavering once again. Tristan DuGrey was fighting a losing battle. Suddenly his hearing was impacted with the most foreign sound he would never want to hear again.

"Help?" a broken voice whimpered…. The sobbing got louder and louder.

Tristan covered his ears. He squeezed his eyes. "Stop…" he moaned "…stop!" But something pulled him down. He fell to his knees and the gravel dug into his shins. Something on his wrist got tighter. The squadron was running to help. But they were too late; Tristan passed out and when opened his eyes again he was looking at the familiar ceiling of Chilton Classrooms. Rory looked up from her corner as soon as she heard a groan. Tristan rubbed his eyes and sat up. Rory didn't know she would be so happy in her life to see Tristan DuGrey. She quickly scrambled to her knees and was at his side. She took him in his arms and squeezed him with all she had left in her.

"Oh…oh I was so scared." She cried

"_Rory_?" Tristan said with confusion as he soothingly rubbed her back. He must be dreaming because never in his life would he be holding her so close.

"One moment we were laughing and then bam!" she gestured as she pulled away from him. Tristan's stomach fell as the regret quickly settled in him.

"I'm…I'm so sorry Rory…I'm so sorry…" he murmured not meeting her eyes.

"For what Tristan?" her face full of concern.

"For…for the crash Rory, it was my fault," Tristan added defeated as he slid away from her.

"Tristan, you couldn't have known what was going to happen, the other cars hit their brakes…" she looked at him hoping to see some sense of recognition to her words. The side of Tristan's lip quivered as he remembered the exact words coming from Tyler. He shook his head trying to rid himself of any form of redemption.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness but just believe me Ror, when I say I'm sorry I hurt you," he looked at her with sincerity in his eyes. With every word he spoke, Rory's heart trembled with emotion.

"The crash wasn't your fault entirely Tristan, get that through your head! So I have nothing to forgive; but I do forgive you for hurting me," she trailed off. Tristan was shocked as he felt his heart begin to swell. Rory looked at her hands as she continued to speak. "I forgive you for calling me Mary; I forgive you for bantering with me to the point that all I think about is how you are going to approach me next; I forgive you for not showing up in the moments that I expect you too; I forgive you for the lingering touches that make my skin burn with fire, and lastly…" she took a deep breath as she willed her courage to back her up.

"I forgive you for going against all I am and making me think of you everyday, miss you when you're not around… and feel something I thought I would never feel for you." Tristan felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. Rory scooted a little closer to him. Tristan felt the heat of her body mingle with his. Her hand timidly reached for his. His eyes watched her hands, as he took in her actions. Her pure fingers reaching for his and finally interlacing with his fingers. He brought her hand up and pressed his lips against the skin on the back of her hand. He looked up at her to find her smiling. He noticed her eyes begin to glaze as she felt a wave of dizziness take over.

"Are you ok Rory," he pulled her closer and brought his hands up to her cheeks. She blinked slowly with a nod.

She sighed, "Yeah, just a little tired." She began to lean into him. Tristan guided her into his arms and nestled her against his chest.

"How can you fall in love with somebody you don't know?" She murmured, as her eyes began to droop shut.

"I think that's why they call it 'soul mates'…" He smiled as he hugged her closer.

"…you believe in that?" she mumbled into his chest. He chuckled feeling her warm breath against him.

"When two people are destined… like it or not… the heart will not lie…" he said as he placed a kiss on top her head.

"Even if you don't know me…" He continued, as she absently rubbed circles on his back.

"I know enough…I know what my heart tells me…I know what my brain is trying to stop me from saying…and I will say it again…I love you…" She said, interrupting whatever he was about to say.

"It's like I read everything about you the first moment I saw you," she continued, and shifted so she could look him in the eye. "I saw the genuine soul…the smirk that made me tingle…I wanted to know you…pssh" she thwacked him lightly. "Then you had to open your mouth." She giggled and lay her head back down. She snuggled closer to him. Rory felt the sweet rumble of his laugh and the steady beat of his heart.

"What can I say…I don't know my way around nice girls…" he closed his eyes as he ran his fingers through her hair.

"How long will this last?" she whispered fearfully. He lifted her face and held her face in his hands.

"Would you dare and forget me?" he said forcefully

"But what if this is not real?" her eyes still droopy.

"You know as well as I do that this is as real as it gets…"he said trying to soothe her.

"But …. But we have to be ready ….for anything" she said, trying to fight off the drowsiness.

"Just kiss me…kiss me when you see me…" he whispered.

"B-…" He placed a finger on her lips to stop her protest.

"No buts Rory…" he smirked "Don't fight the urge and just do it."

"I am not one for spontaneity" Rory chuckled as she let Tristan's body heat make her more comfortable.

"My little Mary is capable of the indescribable." Rory now laughed. "I only speak the truth!" he defended himself from her laughter.

"Why did this take so long?" she whispered into his chest.

"You can blame _that_ on my stupidity," he said dejectedly.


	14. Chapter 14

Yup…I can update!! Haha I will be trying to make them sooner than years apart LOL!!

(Gracias to my beta LoVe23!)

Tristan lay in silence with Rory in his arms. He sighed as he absently ran his fingers through her hair. She snuggled closer to him as if trying to burrow into him. Tristan suddenly winced. Pain laced through his body as different sounds hit his ears. Rory was now above him with fear in her eyes. She held his face in her hands. The sunset behind her gave her an angelic glow. He smiled through the pain that clouded his eyes.

"Tristan!" she screamed. "Please don't leave me!" Tristan groaned in pain and slowly shook his head. She lay on top of him gripping his hands. She continued to murmur against him; her tears leaving trails of regret. He breathed deeply hoping to be able to gain strength to sit up. But Tristan's attempt was futile; his vision went black as she let out a cry.

"Wake up son…please wake up…" a different voice laced through the air. "Don't you dare let go!" it screamed. The sight that met him when he opened his eyes was not the one he hoped for. He was now being hugged tightly. The smell of cinnamon and citrus hit his nostrils.

"Grand dad?" he said groggily; fogging the object over his nose and mouth. He tried to lift his hand to remove the annoying mask.

"Leave that there," Janlan patted is hand. He then reached up to brush the hair away from his eyes. He heard a door close and a constant steady beat of a machine. Tristan breathed in deeply.

"Three days is too long to go without seeing my favorite grandson…" Janlan smiled sadly. Tristan was too tired to give any acknowledgement to his words. Janlan pulled the chair closer to Tristan's bed and sat down never taking his eyes off of him.

"I need you to promise me something Tristan…" Janlan searched his eyes for any sign of understanding. "I need you to take care of yourself more for the next few days; I am working on something…pretty soon" he stopped abruptly. "You'll see soon…" Janlan smiled. Tristan furrowed his brows in confusion. Janlan chuckled and leaned down to peck Tristan on the forehead.

"I'll see you soon son…I'll see you soon." As his grandfather walked out the door Tristan couldn't help but feel a moment of abandonment, even though his grandfather assured him he would be back. Tristan sighed deeply as a nurse walked in. She smiled as she wrote something down and then came up next to his IV.

"You'll be released tomorrow…so now you just need to sleep," she aimed a needle into his IV. Tristan slowly fell into a deep sleep.

Rory felt empty as Tristan disappeared right in front of her. Tears blurred her eyes. The familiar headache clouded her mind again. She cried out in pain as it seemed to hit every nerve in her body. Suddenly something calming ran through her veins; helping her nerves begin to relax. Frantic voices surrounded her and a familiar hand gripped her hand hard. She opened her eyes slowly to see the eyes of her mother. Tears were streaming down her face. Rory reached her free hand forward to wipe them away.

Rory was awake.

(Day Four)

As promised the day before Tristan DuGrey was currently on his way back to his prison. His grandfather didn't show up…he didn't call…he didn't even leave word with anyone. But unbeknownst to Tristan; he had. Tristan fell back into the daily routines. Slowly letting go of everything that defined him and giving himself into the everyday tortures. Day five…Tristan felt the cracks begin. He dropped his boots on the floor and dropped on his chair. His muscles ached and his head was currently trying to see how to let his brain seep through his ears. He wiped the sweat from his brow. He spent the last five hours scrubbing every inch of the common room with a small tooth brush and hand towel. He smirked as he remembered the face of his superior.

_The morning line up after his return seemed to be holding a lot of hostility._

_Tristan stood erect next to his bunk facing a similarly standing Jamie._

"_DuGrey, again with that insipid piece of string tied around your wrist; remove it!" the voice screamed in his ear._

"_Sir I find no reason to…" he answered coolly._

"_Take it off…or your roommate and you are going to be scrubbing the common room with a toothbrush. He heard Jamie groan and saw him hang his head for a second. _

"_No…it will just be me…Jamie can go…" Tristan glared right back. "…Sir" he added_

"_Your death DuGrey!" he turned back to Jamie. "Out Trager!" He spat motioning him out._

"_But-" Jamie began_

"_Out!" he snarled. Jamie gave Tristan a sad look and then quickly walked out. When Tristan finished moments ago, they had thought he would have only done it half way. But he finished…he finished every inch. His torturer said nothing, just a grimace and walked away. _

As he was looking for his toiletry bag, Tristan noticed the sleek black phone. Tristan was missing his friends…he wondered. He pushed the 'On' button. When the phone came to life, he noticed he still hadn't listened to the message from his father. His finger wavered over the call button…and then hit it. After hitting all the required numbers he held it up to his ear:

_There was a shifting sound, followed by grunt. "Tristan!" he paused waiting for an answer._

"_Too good to answer the damn phone eh…" he laughed sarcastically._

"_You insignificant brat…let me tell you something that you should already know by now. 'You will never go anywhere in life, you will never make any money without me and believe me boy, you will never make a name for yourself…" he gave a sigh of satisfaction._

"_Shape up or you'll stay there forever."_

Tristan dropped the phone, not even bothering to turn it off. He needed to get his mind of those words…fast. He felt the anger and anguish building in his gut. He opened another drawer on his desk. His stomach dropped…the collection of letters that he had written Rory sat there. They stared back at him…mocking him for being such a coward. He picked up the four envelopes all dated and they were all stamped. He hung his head and set them back down. Picking up a blank piece of paper he began a new one.

Mary,

I'm sorry…

I was born hated

I grew being unwanted

I am unneeded

And I will die unloved…

So don't worry about me; I mean nothing.

-Tristan

Tristan put his pen down. His eyes stared at the words…daring them to disappear. He slapped the paper in anger and fisted it in his hand. The tightly crumbled ball of paper soared through the air. He leaned forward placing his head in his hands as his body trembled with emotions. He growled as he shifted up and pushed everything off his desk in hopes of relieving some of his anger. He flipped his desk and sent it crashing to the floor. He picked up the lamp and smashed it against the wall. He grabbed the dresser and pushed it to ground. Someone came up behind him and held him tightly trying to stop his rampage. He growled louder and tried to force the hands off.

"Tristan!" the arms spoke. But Tristan was only seeing red. He pulled and when that didn't work. He picked up his foot and sent it slamming into the person's foot. The arms let go; so fast that Tristan lost some of his equilibrium sending him stumbling into the wall. Tristan stood and sent his fist through the window. The glass shattered and some of the million pieces cut through his skin. The arms took him again and held him tightly. Tristan was frozen now. Realization finally caught up with his body. There was a murmuring coming at his ears. A pain tore through his chest forcing him to sag against whoever was holding him. Blood coated his whole hand now. He felt a foreign sob crawl up his throat. Tristan dared to look up at the person who was trying to stop him. It was Jamie…his face full of worry and concern. The sob won and fought through Tristan's resistance. He hung his head. He gritted his teeth as the pain gave him another jolt. "I am Tristan DuGrey…" he managed to say without waver.

"Yeah Tristan I know, what happened why all this…?" Jamie tried to help him stand. But Tristan shook his head.

"I am Tristan DuGrey…I am not my father….I am somebody!" he screamed. Jamie now understood and slowly nodded.

"Where the hell are they…they must have heard by now?" Jamie muttered as he finally was able to get Tristan to move. Tristan was now unresponsive. He helped him sit on his bed. Jamie grabbed a sheet from his bed and gently wrapped his hand in it. The door burst open and in came the cavalry. Some yelled for the perpetrators and others just gasped.

"Someone call Janlan DuGrey **NOW**!" a voice screamed. Jamie looked up and saw them inspecting the damage. The doctor walked in followed by two nurses. Jamie moved away and let him do his work.

"DuGrey," the doctor kneeled by him. But Tristan didn't move or blink. "Med bag Harriet," he motioned for one of the nurses. He pulled out his stethoscope. "I am going to check your heart Tristan," he said before he moved forward. But he got no answer, so he just did as he said. One of the nurses was working on his hand. He turned to Jamie, "Judging from the window did he…?" he left it at that.

"Yes," he answered simply still looking at Tristan worriedly.

"Help me move him to the infirmary," he spoke to the school guards. Two of them came forward. "Careful with the hand!" he ordered as he saw one of them reach for the injured one. Jamie watched as they all left. He didn't know what world he was living in. He muttered an audible curse as he looked down.

Janlan DuGrey sat in a lawyer's office signing documents and hating the day he decided that he didn't ever need more than five hours of sleep a day. It was wreaking havoc on his body. His phone rang. He noticed the caller id, it was his personal assistant.

"Sorry, I have to take this, it might be an emergency." Janlan looked up at the team.

"No problem sir," One of the lawyers nodded as he adjusted his glasses and went back to the paper work.

"Nelson, I told you not to call me unless Armageddon broke loose!" Janlan sighed.

"You are needed at Military Academy," his assistant simply stated.

"Get the room done now," he stood tall at attention. "Call Dr. Anderson and tell him to send me everything; he'll know what I am talking about," Janlan paced. "Get me all the paperwork from Collegiate faxed to my office," Janlan looked back into the office. "Get me a meeting with Dr. Aisner," he heard the scratching of pen on paper. "Thanks," he added and then hung up. He rubbed his eyes and called down to his driver.

"Get the car started we're going over to see Tristan," he said and then hung up. He walked back into the office.

"Sorry to leave but an emergency has come up. Please, anything that needs to be signed, send to my office, and I will have it sent back to you the next day." Janlan buttoned his suit blazer and slipped on his page boy hat. The team stood up and nodded. The same guy that spoke earlier came up to him.

"We'll be in touch Mr. DuGrey," he nodded as he reached to shake his hand. Janlan shook his hand back and nodded in gratitude at the unintended interruption.

He then made his way out of the building as quickly as possible. He had to go see his boy.

Drop a note …  Or not…


	15. Chapter 15

Hello!! Sorry for the long wait….Thanks for stopping by!!

As always thank you to my beta LoVe23!!!

Tristan DuGrey was released from the Academy. His father wasn't phoned; no one back home was. Janlan DuGrey pulled so many strings for Tristan's safety that the puppet of Tristan's old life now laid on the ground. Janlan was doing what he should have done years ago; the moment he saw that his son was falling more in love with money and power than his own flesh and blood. John DuGrey seemed to have lost the sense of love. Love was the only natural sense that humans are born with. Thankfully he didn't squash it out of Tristan's system. Tristan loved to the fullest of his abilities. Yet it was hard to tell by the way he acted and lived most of his life. Janlan knew of the friends he kept and the friends he had. He sighed at the complexity of his grandson's life. The little kid so full of spirit had to come to grow just to fall so low. He put his face in his hands as a myriad of memories flowed through his mind. He shook his head trying to shake the disturbing images out of his head.

He took another look around his new home. Janlan was never one for change; he kept trying the same thing over and over hoping that in the end it would work. But life is about risking the norm to achieve the life you always dreamed of. It was his wife that had him take risks and try to live life like youngsters. He smiled at those memories that floated through his mind. Once she was gone all he had was himself and again he fell back into his old mindset. He continued to watch his son from afar and hoped that Tristan would continue to come to him. The young boy never had ceased to amaze him. Every day that he came to his home there was always a certain feeling in the air. It was a feeling that Janlan could never describe. But it always seemed to fill the hole that his wife had left. Tristan had the tenacity to continue to have the same spirit as his wife. The older he grew; they continued to speak of several different topics. Of travel and the business that someday Janlan hoped he would take over.

"_Tristan," Janlan took his grandson's hand in his. The bouncing boy stopped in his tracks and looked up at his grandfather. His eyes full of curiosity at the sudden stop of their game. He dropped the ball he was holding and gave his full attention to him. _

"_What is it granddad; are you tired?" Tristan knew his grandfather wasn't young and had to take more breaks then he did. _

_Janlan chuckled. "Not yet son, I just…I just want you to keep something in mind for me for the future." He began. He searched the child's eyes for any sense of understanding. Seeing no deference in that act he continued with his thought. "I know you're only twelve but soon you will be a man…" _

"_But granddad I'm already a man!" he stood erect and hit his chest with his fist. This time Janlan laughed._

"_Yes…yes I see that now." he took a deep breath. "There will come a day that I will no longer be around." Suddenly arms came around his torso tight; his aging bones groaning in protest. _

"_No granddad! NO! You can never leave me never! Who will love me if you're not here?" his body shaking with emotion. Janlan barely held back his own. _

"_Never son. Never." Janlan choked out. He'd bring up this subject at a later time. _

As Tristan continued to visit him; Janlan saw a change in him. He became more distant and only talked about things that were occurring elsewhere other than his life. His eyes were losing their spark and his smiles slowly becoming non-existent. He had taken him aside then.

"_Tristan…" Janlan began. He watched him spin the globe and randomly stop it with his finger. _

"_Yeah granddad?" he looked up at Janlan. Like always every time Janlan spoke to him, he never once was short with him or feigned interest._

"_I already know the answer to this but I am going to ask anyway…everything going ok at school?"_

_Tristan smirked, "If you already know the answer, then why do you still ask?"_

"_Because one day I am hoping you will tell me the truth." he answered honestly._

_Tristan sighed taking the globe in both of his hands. _

"_I heard Richard Gilmore's granddaughter started today." Janlan began tentatively. He noticed the slight movements at the mention of the girl. "A bright girl, she will do many good things for the world…just like you." He said, coming around and taking Tristan's hands in his own._

"_You've always thought too well of me granddad." Tristan looked away from him and fidgeted in his grandfather's hold. But Janlan just held on tighter. "Rory Gilmore is in a league all of her own…" he tried to take his hands out of his grandfather's grasp._

"_Listen to me Tristan," he tugged on his arms. Tristan looked at his grandfather now. "You are more than you give yourself credit for, I know you son, I know what you are capable of." Janlan tried to find his eyes but they continued to shift around and not look him in the eyes. "You are a human being full of potential and you have the strength to change the world…and I have no doubt that you will, you just have to believe in yourself as much as I do." Tristan continued to evade his gaze. "That is why sooner than you think I will be handing everything I have over to you. My home, company, contacts…all of it." he slowly let go of his hands. Tristan's eyes were wide with wonder as he finally looked at his grandfather. "You have never let me down Tristan…" Janlan whispered._

He never had…Janlan on the other hand felt like he let Tristan down. Janlan rubbed his eyes; the coldness of his hands soothing his warm face. He was going to make this right…things would change for the both of them. Janlan watched as his staff worked hard, putting away things and tidying some of Tristan's belongings into space around the house.

One of the staff members walked up to him, breaking him of his thoughts.

"Sir…would you like me to take these to the post office?" a young man asked thrusting a box of what looked like letters at him. There were roughly thirty envelopes in the box. He picked one up and the name on them surprised him. They were all addressed to Rory Gilmore. A crumbled paper as well, he opened it and when he read the first two words he quickly closed it.

"Yes, address this one to the same person" he murmured and turned back to the commotion. The home was just missing Tristan; who currently lay sleeping upstairs. He sat down on the newly placed couch as he recounted what happened.

"_We'll sedate him for his safety," the doctor that had met him there told him. _

"_But will this affect his health?" Janlan said worriedly. He waved a hand in front of Tristan's eyes and saw no movement._

"_He is currently in a cationic state;" he stated as he put the last strip on Tristan's bandaged hand. "His mind needs to rest; he must have had a serious emotional trauma that he has retreated into his safe place." The doctor was giving things to his attending nurse to dispose. "He will wake up after the sedative wears off; it will do him good to let him sleep until he wakes on his own," the doctor removed a syringe from his medical bag. Janlan nodded as he took his grandson's good hand in his own. He stared at them for a moment noting the immense contrast…the hand of a man that has worked hard labor all his life and the hand of the boy who has worked all his life for simple recognition from his parents. Janlan stood shakily. The nurse brought forward a wheel chair. "I hope you have his primary doctor ready," the doctor said as he readied the syringe. Janlan nodded and watched as the doctor slowly slid the needle in and pushed in the medication. Tristan was then transferred over to the chair. _

A crash got him out of his trip down memory lane. He got up and quickly went up to Tristan's room. Tristan seemed to be hyperventilating as he frantically looked around in confusion. He stopped abruptly when he saw his grandfather.

"Granddad?" his voice soft and full of emotion.

"You're ok." Janlan stated, while at the same time breathing out a sigh of relief. Tristan took him in his arms and hugged him with all he had left.

"Where am I?" he asked as he pulled away from Janlan.

"Our new house." Janlan smiled as he motioned for him to sit down. "Breathe for me son." he noticed Tristan was still breathing erratically. Tristan tried to calm down as he sat back down on the unfamiliar bed.

"I…what…huh?" so many questions jammed together in his mind.

"First thing's first, your father." Tristan winced at that word. Janlan shook his head slightly. "Your father might have signed some papers thinking they were company business when in reality they were custody papers. He signed and relinquished your custody to me." Janlan smiled noting the pure astonishment on his grandson's face. "I want you to start new here Tristan, I want you to have the life you have always deserved to have and never seemed to be able to gain." Janlan waited for any out lash but none came.

"I don't have to go back…to them?" Tristan simply asked. He was unable to disguise the awe in his voice.

"Not if you don't want to." Janlan wished now like when he was younger that he could read minds. The silence that hung in the air was killing him.

"I'm… _free_?" Tristan's voice wavered. Janlan slowly nodded his head.

"You start at the Collegiate Academy tomorrow…if you're ready…" Janlan sighed deeply knowing he had a very important thing to tell him. Tristan smiled at the thought of new possibilities. He stood up quickly but he sat right back down.

"No…no… I don't deserve this…I should be back at the military school…Lass…Tyler…Rory…" his voice shaking.

"Tristan," Janlan laid a hand on his shoulder. He felt him tense at the touch. "Tristan you can contact them its fine…" Tristan now noticed the familiar box; but it was empty. He got up quickly and grabbed it hoping that somehow by shaking it, its contents would return.

"Where are the letters?!" he shoved the box at Janlan.

"I've had them sent." he stated simply. The box slipped from his fingers.

"What?" his face full of disbelief.

"She has a right to know you're ok, Tristan." Janlan murmured.

"No!" Tristan cried out in dismay, he leaned his head against the opposite wall fearing that he would fall over.

"You owe her that much…" Janlan knew he was hitting low but he needed him to listen. Tristan then crumbled against the opposite wall. Janlan quickly opened the bedroom door and motioned for a man to come in. He came in and helped Tristan stand and eased him back into his bed. Once he was done he nodded at Janlan and walked right back out. Tristan was squeezing his eyes shut hoping that everything that was occurring to him was some kind of nightmare.

"Everything will work out Tristan." he brushed strands from Tristan face. Tristan began to visibly relax. "Just sleep for now." Janlan continued to gently rub Tristan's head until he fell asleep again. He then pulled the covers back up and simply watched his grandson sleep, when he felt his phone vibrate. When he flipped it open and saw the caller, he walked out into the hallway.

"Dr. Aisner how good to hear from you…" he walked a few paces away from the front of Tristan's door. He set up a first available appointment with the doctor, which would be tomorrow afternoon. He had to tell Tristan later today…there was no other way. He finished the work around the new home and set up his den. Hours later a knock came to his door and a familiar face peeked in.

"Granddad…" Tristan smiled crookedly.

Janlan returned his smile noting Tristan's more relaxed attitude. "Son, take a seat." he motioned to the chairs in front of his desk. Tristan sat and looked around the new quarters. New shelves same books; he smiled and looked back at him.

"So…um…" Tristan didn't even know how to begin.

"Tristan there is something I have to tell you….something I should have told you a while ago…" Janlan tapped his fingers on the large envelope that lay on his desk. "When your father sent you away…he didn't even give me a chance to take you home, to talk to you and hope that you were ok… ask you what happened." Janlan's face full of despair. "Only gave me a chance to write you a letter and see you off." his hands fisted.

"It's ok granddad…it's ok…" he murmured sitting closer to the edge of his chair.

"No its not. You see, Tristan…the doctor…he said…he said you have cancer…" Janlan finally let it go; waiting for his reaction.

"Wha…wow…well that's one way to pay…" Tristan sat back in his chair; his forehead in his hand.

"No…no you don't deserve this in any way!" Janlan pushed his body to react and stand. He walked over to Tristan and took him in his arms. Tristan tried to hold back his tears, but was unable to as soon as Janlan's arms came around him. His body shook with sobs and tears fell fast from his eyes. "You have to be strong my boy, you can do this, I know you can!" he said with a quiet fierceness while held Tristan's face in his hands. "You won't leave this world before me!" he begged. "You can't…you can't!" Janlan repeated over and over. "You can fight this, you're going to be somebody sooner than you think…" Janlan murmured as he placed a kiss to Tristan's head, listening to his sobs, as he rocked him back and forth in his arms.

Time went slowly that night. They talked of their plans and of Tristan's future. He would have his treatments here and attend school. Once his treatments were completed, he'd go back to Hartford to graduate with his two best friends and then they would work it out from there.

Drop a note…or not! 


	16. Chapter 16

Gracias to all!! Especially my beta LoVe23!

A week passed and things were ready to change. But not everyone wanted them to change. This really was annoying Rory. She knew they meant well and they wanted to do everything to help her. But really, since waking up all that really was left over were headaches and an ache in her chest. That ache in her chest…it was…it was familiar in some sense but she couldn't put her finger on it. She heard her mother fumbling around in the kitchen as she sat in the living room. She sighed as she absently rubbed her chest hoping to relive some of it pain. Her phone vibrated; she looked at the caller id and saw her grandmother's name flashing. She shook her head and simply turned the phone off. The house phone began to ring this time. The shrill sound being muffled by something and Rory didn't know what. She glanced around the room and noticed the wheel chair pushed in the corner. She closed her eyes and stood. The air was stale in the house…it was getting to her.

"Honey have you seen the phone?" her mom called from the kitchen.

"No mom…" she replied. She touched her head attentively under her hair. She felt the ridge of her scar. Her hair had been cut; the shortest pieces grazing across her forehead. It was a pixie cut but a slightly longer version. Some strands still covering her ears. They had to cut it to get to her wound and ER doctors aren't hair stylists. Her grandmother had one over the next day she was home. The answering machine finally clicked on.

"Lorelai!" her grandmother screamed. "Lorelai you better be taking care of Rory!"

'_That's it_!' she thought, unable to stand it any longer. She had to get out of the house. She had to get some fresh air away from all the smothering. She took off to the center of town leaving behind, her mother screaming for her to come back home. She walked with a brisk pace feeling the stares burning at her back. She walked in to Luke's the only person here in town that wasn't acting like she was going to fall apart at any moment. The bell that signaled her entrance rang a little too long in her ears. Luke looked up from the coffee pot and smiled, motioning her over to the bar stools.

"Good morning Rory!" he set an empty coffee cup in front of her.

"Wow…" she looked around…waiting.

"Uh…Rory?" he asked as he began to pour the liquid.

"Just waiting for someone to come flying at me to stop me from picking up the cup." she said in mock fear. Luke laughed as he walked over to another customer. She sipped patiently letting the hot liquid soothe her.

"So I'm guessing its getting a little much at home?" Luke came back and set down the coffee pot.

"A little?" she cocked an eyebrow.

"Ok, a lot." he chuckled again. "Just remember Rory, they all love you and they just want you to be safe." He leaned against the counter. "Nothing this drastic has ever happened in your life and those surrounding you; so give them a break…they feel like they need to protect you." He said, giving her a knowing look.

"But…" she began to whimper. Luke quickly put up his hand to stop her.

"It will blow over soon. Don't work at it, just show them nicely that you can take care of yourself," he caringly held her chin. Rory nodded as someone sat down next to her.

"SOOOOOO……I was going to take these to your house but seeing as you're here." Kirk set a stack of envelopes in front of her.

"What…" she said in shock looking at all the letters.

"Wait there's more." he said placing more letters down in front of her. "Geez someone really wants to get their point across." Kirk shook his head and just left without another word, mumbling to himself.

Rory picked up the first envelope and saw her name and address scrawled across it. A date on the bottom right corner but there was no return address.

"Do you know who would write to you?" Luke asked, as he picking up a random envelope.

A name came to mind…burning in its wake. She shrugged her shoulders though and began to chronologically organize them all. Her hands shook slightly as she picked up the first one. It was dated right after her accident.

_My Mary,_

Her heart jumped.

_I am so sorry...I wouldn't blame you if you never forgave me. I don't deserve anything from you. I am so sorry I caused all of this. Your beautiful eyes are closed and I don't know for how long. I hope you wake up soon and come back to your mother. She misses you so much. She has hardly spent a day without you. This must be killing her to her very core. She told me I could write you and maybe she would give these to you. But I don't think I am worthy of even having my words being read by you. I don't know how many times I can repeat that I am sorry… from the depths of my soul. It physically pains me knowing that I have hurt you. Just when I thought I could finally get a chance to explain and show you who I really am… I did this. It shows you how much fate thinks it's better that I don't._

_So maybe I won't send this out…I'll continue to write these though…hoping someday my cowardly ways stop getting the best of me. _

_Forever sorry,_

_Tristan_

She quickly closed that letter in her trembling hands and picked up the next one.

_My Mary,_

_Every minute I am living I think of you; I will for the rest of my life. I will relish in feeling the pain of rejection. I need to take on that pain; even though it will never be close to the pain that you are living through. God how I wish I was taught to love a creature as beautiful as you from the moment I was born. _

_I must go for today._

_Forever sorry,_

_Tristan_

Rory quickly moved to the next letter.

_My Mary,_

_Today I saw the sun…it lit up the sky. The blue so crystalline- so pure… I ran back inside. I felt dirty…It was your sky, it was your eyes, and it was yours. I couldn't blemish it…....I'm a monster._

She couldn't finish that letter…her tears were marring the words. She heard Luke faintly talking to her but she didn't pay attention. Letter after letter…I'm sorry's, I'm a monster, I don't deserve love… But Rory was able to read between the lines…read what he was really trying to say; I love you with all my heart. Those were the only words that mattered to her. Luke started to pick them up.

"NO!" she screamed. People in the diner jumped and stared at her.

"Get back to what you were doing!" Luke growled at the patrons. Rory was able to get the last two out of his grasp.

_My Mary,_

_I had an incident today…and thanks to that I had the strangest dream and you were in it; so scared until I appeared. You don't know how it felt dreaming of you in my arms._ _You kissed me…it was the greatest feeling I could remember. It felt so real so true…I'll stop now before I continue to creep you out…_

_Dreaming for one more day,_

_Tristan_

The next one she read…broke her heart to shreds. The paper was crumpled and laid flat.

_Mary,_

_I'm sorry…_

_I was born hated._

_I grew being unwanted._

_I am unneeded._

_And I will die unloved… _

_So don't worry about me; I mean nothing._

_Tristan_

Sobs shook her body. Luke quickly scooped her up in his arms as she cried. He carried her up the stairs into his upstairs apartment. She pulled back and gripped Luke's collar.

"He so…broken…….he blames himself so much…oh my god….." she leaned back against him. "All he wanted was to be loved and … and…. Oh no…." she cried against him. Luke soothingly rubbed her back and whispered encouragements in her ear. She cried for hours and Luke knew that this couldn't be good for her health. Thankfully she sighed a moment later and fell asleep against him; clutching his shirt. He slowly pulled her hands away and laid her in his bed. He picked up a plaid blanket and tucked her in. He had a lot of things going through his mind. He slowly closed the door behind him and went back down into the diner. Lorelai was frantically looking around for Rory.

"Luke! Rory! I can't find her, she turned off her phone!" she attempted to shake him by his arms.

"Shhh…" he hugged her. "She's sleeping upstairs; she just cried her eyes out." Lorelai pulled back and made like she was going to go. "No, just let her rest." Luke pushed Lorelai in a nearby chair. Lorelai held her chest as if trying to stop her heart from making its way out of her chest.

"Kirk found her here and gave her a bunch of letters from that boy, like he just dumped them in the mail box, a month's worth." Luke motioned to the stack behind him. Lorelai got up and went to the stack. She grabbed one and began to take a letter out. Luke quickly stopped her.

"Wait… wait! What are you doing?!" he took the letters and placed them behind the counter.

"Luke give me those, I need to know what made my baby cry! How that kid is still hurting my daughter even though he's not even here!" she yelled, making an attempt to go behind him.

"You're jumping the gun Lore, those letters are Rory's and from what I could get it was just letters of how he was falling apart without her." Luke dared Lorelai.

"Geez," she sighed. "You'd think these kids were starring in their own soap opera…These Are the Days of Chiltonites!" she set her head on the table. Luke went over and filled a cup of coffee for her and set it next to her. She mumbled a 'thanks' in between her arms and the table.

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